Spirit of the Eagle

Today I put my family on a 10 day negativity fast. Why? Well I am tired of being depressed. I am tired of us all pointing out the negative things instead of the good. My own son is tired of it! He kept reminding me what he did right while I pointed out what he did wrong. It was a wake up call for me. It came to me in the shower *don’t all great ideas seem to come to you in the shower?*. A comment that was made a little earlier made me snap and say:
today is the day we go on this negativity fast. That includes our thoughts, not just our actions and words. This should be is good!

Very soon, I will be undertaking something that God has been speaking to me about for a while. I will be making a prayer shawl. I tried to use the blanket that my grandmother gave me, and that was sufficient for a while, but now I am being called to make my own special shawl specifically for prayer. If you look up the history and meaning behind prayer shawls, you will see that they have been significant throughout history, especially in Judaism. It is considered a way to create a sacred place to pray. There is a lot of information about the original prayer shawls and how they have evolved to become universally used by many people today. I don’t know exactly when I will find the material that God wants me to use, but I know that this shawl will be dang awesome when it’s done.

I asked God to make me enough.

He said “My grace is sufficient for you”.

I asked Him again, to make me enough.

He said “I have already made you perfect, what more can you want?”.

My husband decided to get me one of the bibles that I have been wanting for a long time as an early anniversary present. I kept looking at the prices, instead of the bibles *as I tend to do*. Eventually I was talked into getting the Life Application Study Bible NLT by the owner of the store. The owner is a long time Christian friend of ours who we esteem dearly. I got the bible, got it home, and got angry.

Why?

Well because my husband took the bible, read a bit of it, and told me it’s a “simple language” version of his Nelson study bible. Now, here is where I get offended. I am not stupid. I am not an idiot. He thought it was a good bible for me because it was simpler. That made me feel like he was calling me uneducated. Did he call me that? No. Did he imply it? Not really. My offense was because I am used to being called retarded, stupid, uneducated by random people who are mad at me for whatever it is that I do know. My husband was innocently thinking that the Bible would be a good fit for me, not because my intellect couldn’t handle it, but because it was a practical language fit for practical speaking me. It was hard for me to get over that feeling, that offense was too deep for me to see the truth. I am still trying to convince myself. I have taken full possession over the bible, as it was recommended and agreed upon by two men that I respect. I have filled in the pages with my information in the front, and I am trying not to feel like an idiot while I read the explanations at the bottom of the pages.

It is going to take a while, but I know there is a purpose for me getting this particular bible instead of the parallel expanded bible that I had been looking at that night.

My mother in law is in the hospital right now getting surgery on her stomach. Something ruptured. Don’t know much else, but please pray. I will let you know more when I can. Thank you all and God bless!!!

I am now at liberty to speak about the ministry which God has lead me to begin in my church. It is called Into the Light and is a ministry for women 16 years + seeking help with sexual addictions and temptations. The ministry begins on the 21st of this month. My main focus is the book and guided journal called Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul. I can’t wait to dive into this ministry. At first, I was apprehensive, but God is loving me through this, so I know it will be alright. I have already had someone approach me to see if I need help teaching this course. I am so grateful.

I am also becoming a member of my church this month. I started membership classes this passed Sunday. By October, I will be a full fledged member of the congregation. The more I learn about this church, the more I interact with the people, the more I love them. I am so happy that God has brought me to this place, even if other people don’t think that it’s “my church”. No church can replace the mother church that birthed me into this general congregation called “assemblies of God”, but that doesn’t mean that God won’t move me throughout the body to be a blessing where I can.

Oh Great Spirit, today help me to know myself. Help me to see the joy, kindness, strength and beauty that I am.

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“Once you have achieved this oneness, when you talk, God talks; when you act, God acts.”
–Chuck Ross, LAKOTA

In my innermost self, I know this to be true. I know of this oneness. The more I am free of doubt, jealousy, judgment, selfishness, anger, the closer I am to this oneness. When I am right with the Creator, nothing can touch me. When I am right with the Creator I always say the right things. When I am right with the Creator, my thoughts are always good. When I am right with the Creator, my actions are always good.

Great Spirit, remove from me those things that block me from You. Allow me this day to experience the oneness.

First Americans for Obama

The other day I was flat ironing my hair. My left arm gets tired very quickly as it has been messed up since the car accident in 1998 that rendered it virtually useless for about six months. So, as I am doing my hair I get frustrated and exclaim: This is TIRESOME!!!

Only to hear that still small voice speak and say: but the end result is worth it, right?

Just like your walk with Jesus.

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Then it came to me that, like my flat iron, God turns up the heat to make our crooked ways straight. He applies the right pressure to straighten out our lives and make us shiny, vibrant, and beautiful. We have to be willing to let him work it out, though…and when we get back to our rough ways, we have to be willing to allow Him to do it all over again.